The lower mode at the highest level

De onderste mode op het hoogste niveau
mrt 25, 2019

Sir Sebastian visiting Lech!

Say hello there, dear reader legion - how lovely to see my audience slowly but surely growing. I mean, I was already quite a player in the world of designer lingerie, of course, but a little influencer wants more influence every day, you understand that. Share my amazing facts and unsalted sub fashion reports with everyone you know, and in no time I'll be the most dominant alpha male in the business! And: have we all recovered a bit from the carnival? I'm happy to tell you that I'm all over Jan myself again, although the party and the lingerie I found there have made deep inroads into my sensitive little soul. An experience richer, an illusion poorer, shall we say. Time to look ahead, people, spring is coming! Do you guys feel a little sizzling in the air? I do, anyway. Spring jitters all over the place. There must be a lingerie item to go with that, I think. First of all, let's get away from it all with the special meeting I had around Carnival in picturesque Austria, because your raging reporter hasn't been sitting still the past few weeks...

 

 

By audience

Austria? I hear you think so. A well-deserved skiing holiday? Paragliding from the peaks? A crash course in yodeling? None of that, highly honored audience. It was time for an in-depth interview at high altitude. This was my moment with the boss above boss - the absolute upper class of the underwear, so to speak. I had managed to be granted an audience with our own incomparable royal family, while they enjoyed a year of royal entertainment in beautiful Lech. I was checked by the Rijksvoorlichtingsdienst, searched by broad security guards and threw away the list of questions I was not allowed to ask ab-so-luut. Fearless I went to work.


My expectations were high as I excitedly tripped up the snow-covered mountainside. Understandable, because let's face it: who doesn't burn with desire to know what's between the velvet of the throne and the royal buttock? Or how generously a royally designed bra sits? Okay, come on: maybe I was a little nervous when I passed the last broad gentleman with sunglasses and earplugs, but I was determined to drag something beautiful out of the fire for you!


Generous reception

I was led into a beautiful front room, where a table full of goodies was waiting for me. I had planned to embark on this important adventure soberly, but in the face of so much glory, I decided that a small cardiac tonic could do no harm. An orange bitter perhaps? No, I'll have champagne anyway, please. Thank you. A little sip did wonders. The slight vibration disappeared from my forelegs, just in time to see the door on the other side of the room slowly opened...

 

There they were! No music, no drum roll or clarion call, no, none of that. The entire First Family of our country walked in relaxed, just like a family should do on holiday. I suddenly began to wonder if this was not a big mistake. Máxima, Willem-Alexander, the princesses... ...were they actually waiting for me to ask them literally the shirt off their bodies?

 

 

The ice broken

Fortunately, Queen Máxima was courteous enough to break the ice immediately. "So," she said decidedly, "so you are the famous Sir Sebastian. How pleasant to be able to converse in this relaxed atmosphere on something other than state affairs and troublesome family relationships. Lingerie is such an underappreciated topic in social debate these days, don't you think?" That, dear readers, was very direct even for me. I couldn't get much more than stalked out of it. "Er, yes, Your Majesty, no, Your Highness, Your Honor, that is to say, er... Well, now. Absolutely. Whatever you say, Mrs. Máxima. Exactly that - you hit the nail on the head, so to speak. Ahum." I immediately forgot what I came here for...

 

Our King took over the baton from his spouse and put me at ease by sharing a light anecdote. "Do you know, Lord Sebastian, that our Dutch design lingerie is worn by royal houses all over the world?" Much more than a "No, Your Majesty" I couldn't muster. "Certainly," he continued. "You should know, while at home wondering who the designers of the hats and gala dresses are, we deal with very different matters. The days of tight corsets and chastity belts are long gone, so to speak." A fat wink from Máxima confirmed his claim. I believe that with that the tension was definitely out of the air.

 

"Moreover," His Majesty continued, "it is often not done to cut tespeechen and ribbons in such a stiff uniform.
Then a nice tight boxer or a frivolous string is really a relief, I can assure you. Biscuits? Stiltwalking? I shouldn't think I'd have to endure the next King's Day in a silly and uncomfortable gentleman 's slip." I nodded enthusiastically. "Just the other day I ordered the whole new collection of Royal Lounge Junky online for Max - I thought the name was appropriate." There followed some giggling from the princesses in the corner, who had been playing with their royal cell phones a little bored until then.

 

 

Princess dress

Amalia took the floor. "Well, Daddy, you're being so light and laconic about Mommy's lingerie, but I remember when I once asked for something other than yet another princess dress..." The royal couple exchanged an uncomfortable look. Sisters Alexia and Ariane suddenly took an interest in the conversation. "Yes, Dad," said the middle one, "you mumbled something about 'tax dollars' and 'irresponsible spending' and then you dropped off." I didn't dare to get involved. Ariane headed him, "It was only when Amalia threatened to go into town and score herself that you changed your mind."

 

Well, little children grow up: princesses too, of course. I decided to save the situation. "But in the end you convinced your father, Your Princessess? That must have felt like a victory." Completely adolescent, she replied grinning, "Really?" With a mischievous look, she added, "Royal stuff, those Boobs & Bloomers bras." Look, I thought that was royal fashion tip two. Now get on with it!


The Crown Jewels

Of course I wanted to stay neat and polite, because when does a poodle come face to face with the complete royalty of our country? Yet I had to ask - for your sake, but also for my own peace of mind. "Madam... Madame Queen, Your Highness..." It's that dogs can't sweat, but otherwise I'd be clammy between the buttocks. "Your Highness, if I may be so bold, what would you prefer to wear under all those gorgeous dresses and robes? The under crown jewels, so to speak - do you have any favourites?"

 

"Several even, dear Sebastian", she nodded to me with her incomparable smile. "But it would be impertinent to tell what the royal preference is, don't you think? In connection with unfair competition?" I nodded meekly. "Of course, Your Highness. Extremely impertinent," I said with a slightly disappointed look. Did I have to keep asking? Was it Marlies Dekkers? A nice smooth Sloggi? A sultry set of After Eden? Or just a bit of everything? And what would look best on her... A fancy suspender belt? An airy negligee? A simple set as an example of Dutch sobriety, or that tanga to keep the Argentine tango in? What about bras? What do you think: braces, strapless, a push-up, or would the support of the State be sufficient?

 

I decided to make one more brave attempt. I burned with curiosity and threw it out: "But please, Madame Queen, give me something to satisfy the Dutch women (and men)... Otherwise the gossip magazines will have to fill in everything again and come up with something. You are our figurehead of emancipation, aren't you? Help the lingerie wearers of your country out of the fire!"

 

 

State secret number 1

"Well," she said after some hesitation, "my dear Sir Sebastian, I'll give you a little hint." I held my breath. "Would you like to know what I, as Queen, prefer to wear under my favourite designer dresses?" I nodded tense, my tongue inelegantly out of my mouth. "Please, Your Majesty!" "Very well. "She reached for her glass to increase the tension. "Preferably," she continued, "I wear under a beautiful dress..." I didn't dare to breathe. "- a pair of stiletto heels."

 

What did she mean? Did she mean this?! Was she fooling me, or did she really mean that she'd rather NOT...? I didn't anymore, gasped for breath and was totally out of my mind. The royal family looked at each other very meaningfully and burst out laughing together. I couldn't help but laugh, dear readers. I can assure you that it was still a long afternoon there in Lech, where things were said that I had to swear I would never tell them. Fortunately, you know that I am one of the most discreet dogs in the country, so who knows, I may soon be able to reveal some of the most spicy underwear secrets of the highest level...

 

Until then, be good as a poodle and grab as much spring sun as possible, then I'll be back soon with new dizzying lingerie adventures!

 

 

Your very own Sir Sebastian - Spotted dog beyond the stitch of the stocking

Entirely yours and with sincere wagging,

Sir Sebastian
Lingerie guru extraordinaire

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